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Anonymous <nobody@REPLAY.COM>, a.k.a. Son of Xemu (Xenu) landed his ship by
the flagpole on the front lawn of the ARSCC Chimerical Library, swaggered
in, flexed his big, firm, alien muscle and said:
<SNIPPITY, SNIPPITY>
>
> OK - I'll take that challenge!
>
>>The fact that she was Hubbard's wife tended to overshadow more
>>important facts: Hubbard himself had disappeared in February of
>>1980 under mysterious circumstances still not satisfactorily
>>explained, and Mary Sue Hubbard--with the aid of the Guardian's
>>Office--had been left with the duty and the power to safeguard
>>his copyrights and trademarks.
>> But in July of 1981, Mary Sue Hubbard was overthrown, losing
>> ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
>>her long-held control over Scientology's copyrights and
>>trademarks. Soon after, the Guardian's Office was disbanded.
>
> This is the popular version, but how do you know its the
>truth? MSH didn't have the "aid" of the GO, she WAS the
>GUARDIAN responsible for safeguarding LRH.
>
<DAINTY FINGERNAIL SCISSORS SNIP AWAY LIMP ALIEN SPECULATION>
Hi, Son. (You don't mind if I get familiar and call you by your first name,
do you big-eyes?)
First, sweetie, the Librarian loves HARD FACTS, not LIMP OPINIONS and
SPECULATIONS. Now, I *know* I get a little loose in the lips
sometimes--these full, cupid's-bow, moist lips--and will now and then toss
out my own ideas about things, but those are just the wandering thoughts of
a lonely librarian, and if you'll notice carefully, the only *important*
things I give you are documents from sources *you* can verify for yourself.
Shoot, I don't mind guesses--in fact, I *love* a man with an imagination.
But until there are more FACTS to build a case on, let's just stick to what
we've got in front of us. No I *don't* mean those, silly! Geez, you aliens
are *all* alike!
I promised you documentation to *support* what is said in the press
release. And your loving, unpretentious Librarian always delivers. So here
is David Miscavige's own overblown account:
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"Mary Sue Hubbard was removed from her post before she went to jail. I
know, because I personally met with her and obtained her resignation... .
At first, Mary Sue Hubbard was not willing to resign. Eventually she did
so. Mary Sue Hubbard and the GO, however, did not simply capitulate... .
Within a day of Mary Sue Hubbard's resignation, senior GO officials
secretly met with Mary Sue Hubbard and conspired to regain control of the
GO. Mary Sue Hubbard signed a letter revoking her resignation and
condemning the actions of the CMO. Scores of GO staff responded, locking
the missionaires out of their premises and were intending to hire armed
guards to bar access by me and the other Church officials who had ousted
them. I then confronted the mutineers, and persuaded Mary Sue Hubbard to
again resign, which ended the last vestige of GO resistance."
Declaration of
DAVID MISCAVIGE
(for a case in the UNITED STATES DISTRICT COURT FOR THE CENTRAL DISTRICT OF
CALIFORNIA: CHURCH OF SCIENTOLOGY INTERNATIONAL, Plaintiff, vs. STEVEN
FISHMAN and UWE GEERTZ, Defendants.)
---------------------------------------------------------------
So, there ya' go, big-eyes. You could call it the "official version," or
the "runt version," or the "I'm gonna' lie my ass off and sound like a big
hero 'cause nobody can stop me" version, or the "IRS-approved CTCC"
version. (That last one would get *my* vote.) Shoot, you can call it any
darn thing you want, sweetie.
The sad fact is that it's the *only* version anybody's got right now. Don't
you find that really, really odd? Even if you *are* at least half alien.
(By the way, *who* was "Mom?" Whoo-o-o-owhee! *That* must have been *some*
ride!) Anywaaaayz, I sure would like to hear from some of those "other
Church officials" DM refers too. Wouldn't you? Heck, I'd just like to know
who they were.
Now as for your statement that, "MSH didn't have the 'aid' of the GO, she
WAS the GUARDIAN responsible for safeguarding LRH;" well, listen, sweetie,
you musta' been breathing too much oxygen or something, and I think you
ought to just go sit down in that mountain with Pop for a couple of
millenia and think that thought all the way through, and then get back to
me. I'll give you a hint about the way *my* addled little brain works: how
would the term "Sheriff's Department" relate to the term "Guardian's
Office"? (Hiya, Sheriff! Just thought I'd get a plug in for you, you cutie,
you!)
Well, big-eyes, thanks for landing outside the ARSCC Library and dropping
in. Looks like your ship is drawing a crowd of gawkers. Come back anytime.
Now *I've* got to go find even *more* copyright transfers for that
*demanding* Zed! He runs your Pop's remailer, you know. And The Postman
Always Rings My Bell!
--<The ARSCC Librarian>
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*The ARSCC, like its equal-opportunity (even for aliens!) Librarian, does
not exist